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Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Predictably Pathetic

Reading through the blogs and papers about the "situation" in Zimbabwe (code word for death and destruction), I see as usual the most imaginative response is to debate on the merits of playing non-contact sports.

And we are supposed to feel like we've achieved something if we decide to play cricket or not?

"Mr Robert Sir, NZ have cancelled the tour. We are going to have to stop killing women and children (and other people)."

"Curses. Those bastards display all the cunning of a soviet chess player working for the KGB. Call off the tractors, we'll have to change our strategy."

I know we have bugger all army, but don't we have professional ambassadors? Send over Johnathon Hunt (by taxi if necessary) for a personal audience with Mugabe and explain just how "alarmed" NZ is. Make sure he drops by the other African Nations and has a chat. Given he's in London, perhaps he can convince a few British folk to travel with him (aren't they part of the commonwealth?) For Gods sake, maybe the SAS will hold his umbrella on the trip.

Wouldn't it look like we actually care if every single commonwealth country turned up on the border of Zimbabwe to crash Roberts 10th Wedding Anniversary party "Oh Robert - you've taken out the garbage - what a nice presie, but what are all those flags doing waving on the border?"

And some-one hide the Cricket Team's Balls. Assuming they have any.

Posted by ZenTiger | 6/28/2005 11:40:00 pm


Blogger Bernard Woolley said...

Perhaps Hunt could take a coat this time so that the sh1t doesn't stick to him... :)

6/29/2005 10:25:00 am  
Blogger ZenTiger said...

Yes Bernard; I thought I'd throw in a sideswipe at Mr Hunt.

Just imagine the phone going and Ms Clark saying "John-boy, I know we didn't plan for this, but you've got work to do"

"But what do I say?"

"You were speaker - you figure it out"

6/29/2005 10:39:00 am  

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